How Should I Respond When My Daughter Sins? The Six C’s That Will Change Your Perspective ~ Part 3

How Should I Respond When My Daughter Sins How Should I Respond When My Daughter Sins? The Six C’s That Will Change Your Perspective ~ Part 3

(Excerpt from Raising God’s Girl Chapter 5 “That’s My Girl? Walking Through Seasons of Disappointment and Pain)

It’s no wonder I am exhausted; I am surrounded by sinners all day long! And the worst part is that when I brush my teeth every morning, I look up and see the chief of sinners staring back at me from the mirror (1 Tim. 1:15). Life can be challenging, and parenting only increases the pressure and the stakes. In this series, we’ll look at some biblical qualities that can help us succeed in this adventure of Raising God’s Girl.

{To receive encouragement for the first “C” ~ COMPASSION and second “C” ~ CONVICTION, please see our previous blog posts. Now we are going to discuss the next “C” ~ COMMITMENT.}

 COMMITMENT 

We need to be committed parents, no matter how stormy life gets. But what are we to be committed to? We need to be committed to raising God’s girls in His way, with His power—for His purposes. This sobering commitment leads to the next: We need to be committed to loving our daughters even when they are acting “unlovable.” Here we are going to get into the messy part of parenting. The part that can be embarrassing and bring turmoil to the whole family. What do we do when our daughters’ sin is exploding all over the place?

The answer is this: stay committed to your love for her and your desire to see her walk in all the Lord has for her. And when that commitment is honestly just not strong enough, cling to the Lord and show love to your daughter because you fear the Lord and are committed to Him.

Does this last statement shock you? That our commitment to loving our daughters might not be strong enough to get us through the storm? Or maybe you’ve felt that way, but never put it into words. The truth is parenting is hard, especially when our daughters are resistant.

Picture this: what if your co-worker was mad at you all the time, glared at you when you walked by, rolled her eyes when you made a suggestion, and tried to ignore you when you walked into her office to talk about something? Would you want to work with her?

What if you overheard one of your friends talking about how mean you are and stole money from your drawer whenever she was in your home? Would you want to hang out with her?

Or what if a friend stopped by for dinner and was grumpy and made fun of what was being shared during mealtime conversation? Would you want to include her in family gatherings?

The answer to these questions is no, of course not. But we are called to co-labor with our daughters, hang out with them, and include them in family events. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 teaches us: “These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.” This describes a life of hanging out with daughters, with no escape clause for difficulty.

The truth that parenting is hard is followed by another truth: parenting can hurt. We can be hurt by what our daughters do and say, and even more so because we love them so much. The exact heart attitude that helps make us great parents also opens us up to great hurt. When we pour our hearts into raising our daughters and give them our very best, it is devastating when this is refused, even temporarily. We can feel rejected. It is then our natural instinct to want to close up and protect ourselves—to distance ourselves from the pain and ultimately distance ourselves from our daughter.

But this is where commitment to the Lord comes to the rescue.

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